Our Baby Girl
by BellaBEARx
Summary: Lindsay knew she shouldn't have done it, she shouldn't have punched that guy in the face. To anyone else that wouldn't have been a statement to make them explode, but to her it was. He deserved it anyway.


**A/N: This takes place right after Maybe, Baby. That episode is by far my favorite and this ideas just popped into my head at school and I had to write it.**

Lindsey couldn't help but be completely pissed off. That man had absolutely no right to say that. Yet again she's a cop and shouldn't have punched him in the face. Tom had pulled her off of that guy and the sad part is Tom knew exactly why he had to. She wasn't pouting, she thought to herself. Even though Lindsey knew very much that she looked like she was. They had finally cracked the case and everything was over, and for some reason she sat at her desk head in her hands his words running through her head over and over again like a broken record.

"If you want a baby sweetheart, I'll give you one" she had knocked him out of his chair then proceeded to kick the chair across the interrogation room. To any other person that might not have been a statement to make them explode, but to her it was. She couldn't believe she had let that guy get to her, she felt stupid, like a bad cop. That's when she thought about Anna. She wanted to cry. She reached over and pulled the picture off the filing cabinet. The one she kept telling herself she needed to get a frame for, the same one that sits on her night stand, next to her bed. She stared at her own smiling face, then at Tom's who was right next to her, than at the tiny baby in her arms. The picture was taken at the hospital right after Anna was born. Lindsey, lying in the uncomfortable bed holding her new baby girl and Tom, pulled up in a chair right next to her. Her eyes started to water but Lindsey knew she wasn't going to cry. She missed her baby…And, she missed her husband. She heard Jacobi coming over from another interrogation room then turn around and leave; she knew exactly what he was going to do. It was what any other person did when they saw her with that picture, he went to get Claire, but Lindsey knew Claire was gone for the night. She knew Jacobi had left to get Tom, the only one that she could seek comfort from when it came to they're baby. She quickly got up and went out to her explorer… She had to leave… She just couldn't stay at her desk, not when she knew Tom would come down those stairs looking for her. As she got in her car she let her head rest on the steering wheel waiting till she was calm enough to drive herself home. But it was at that moment that she realized why it had made her so upset, she had been dreading it for a couple days now like she did every year but threw out her concerns when the case came up. She realized the day after Tom's wedding which was this weekend was Anna's birthday. She would be four this year. That's when Lindsey's flood gates opened wide, all her tears flowing out. Lindsey couldn't help it. She kept thinking of what it would be like if she was still here. With tears still spilling down her face Lindsey debated on whether or not to call Claire. She decided not to. She just wanted to be alone.

She wasn't alone that night. Tom stopped by and they had done something they probably shouldn't have. Okay, not probably they defiantly shouldn't have, was all Lindsey could think about. They moved past it, they slept together, but Tom was still getting married. Then, everything just went down hill from there. She could have sworn she was pregnant. And maybe that was just the part of her that wanted to be. She still wanted kids. Was she going to find Mr. Right? Probably not. So she slowly let the dream of children wash away as she sometimes didn't know if she would be able to go through what she went through with Anna all over again.

Tom's wedding was tomorrow. She could barely take it. She couldn't stop herself from thinking that Anna's birthday was the day after. Lindsey was starting to wonder if Tom had forgotten. Lindsey slowly walked up the stairs to Tom's office, holding a coffee cup in one hand and a manila folder in the other. When she got there Tom was on the phone, by his tone of voice she figured he was talking to Heather. He motioned for her to wait as he continued talking. Lindsey stood there not really knowing what to do; she placed the file on the corner of his desk and sipped from her coffee. She felt like she was intruding on the phone call and wanted to leave, that was until Tom's calendar caught her eye. There was a scribble on this weekend. She figured it said something along the lines of 'my wedding' but she walked to the wall it hung on to get a closer look at anyway. She almost dropped her coffee mug as she read what it said. Saturday, the day of the wedding was marked with nothing; it was the day after that was marked. It Tom's familiar scrawl was printed 'baby girl's birthday'. She felt her eyes well up with tears, but she refused to let them fall. She graced her finger across the words and a sad frown came onto her face.

"I haven't told Heather about her" Tom said. Lindsey once again almost dropped her coffee; she hadn't even heard him hang up. Lindsey didn't say anything though. She knew he wasn't finished talking. "I told her over and over I didn't want the wedding that weekend. But that's how it's scheduled isn't it?" He sighed. "I miss her so much Lindz, I can't help but think about what it would be like if she was still here sometimes." Lindsey finally turned and took a seat in the chair on the other side of his desk. "I want to tell Heather you see, but then the other night will come up… And I know I need to tell her about that too. And all I have is tonight. And Heather is the kind of woman that… Well, she won't let something like that fly under the radar." Lindsey just looked at him. She didn't trust herself to open her mouth and say anything. But her mouth seemed to be acting on its own accord.

"I'm sure everything will be fine Tom" Lindsey said softly. She was on the verge of breaking. She lost her daughter. And now, tomorrow… She would officially loose her husband… Ex-husband.

"That's not even the worst thing Lindz, I wouldn't even fight her if she wanted to leave" Tom lowered his head, like a five year old being scorned. Lindsey had nothing to say. They sat there in silence for what seemed like forever, until Lindsey decided it was time for her to go. She needed a shoulder to cry on, she had to find Claire. Lindsey stood up and took the folder from the corner and placed it in front of Tom, then in a voice that sounded like a helpless 5 year-old Lindsey said.

"I just wanted to drop this off'" then she darted out and down the stairs. The tears started coming before she even got to her best friend.

It was Sunday. The sky was an orangey pink color as Lindsey walked around all the graves. She spotted the light pink one and sat next to it. She ran her fingers over the carved words.

Anna Michelle Hogan  
Our Baby Girl

Tears started to well in her eyes as she ran a finger over the birth and death dates that were only four days apart. She felt a hand grab hers and another wipe away her tears. She smiled a bit.

"Mommy loves you baby girl" she whispered.

"Daddy loves you too" Tom said from where he sat next to her. They sat there awhile just them with their baby girl. Tom took Lindsey's hand as he led her back to the car. She couldn't help but let a tiny smile on her face at the thought that there was no ring there. And there wouldn't ever be one there, not from anyone else anyway.

**A/N: I hope you liked it, and thanks for reading. Leave some comments if you like :) **


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